Choosing a college can be stressful. There’s the fees you have to pay, the SATs you have to take, not to mention the overwhelming choice of which colleges are in your shortlist. However, applying for colleges can be an adrenaline rush, the acceptances rewarding, and the satisfaction with just being done with it all has its perks. As a freshman in college, it wasn’t too long ago when I was searching for colleges and fighting to get paperwork in before the deadlines. I’m happy to have the opportunity to share with you some of the more important parts about choosing a college and what you should keep in mind.

There are thousands -even tens of thousands- of colleges in the United States, not to mention the number of international schools out there. Should you go to community college? How about a public university? Or even a private school? Should you even go to college? Maybe you should take a gap year in some foreign country helping children or even work for the upcoming tuition? The possibilities are truly endless. I can’t tell you what the right choice is, mostly because I don’t believe there is one; but I can tell you my story and hope that you draw some comfort or advisement in what I say.

Let’s begin with the most agonizing part of the college process: picking one. My college counsellor during my senior year of high school had a small list of colleges that she knew a crazy amount about that she would tell students to apply to. About 20 colleges’ flags were taped on the walls of her office, and she had connections within most of those colleges. Outside of those 20-or-so, we students barely registered that there were more options out there. I’m not saying to negate everything your college or guidance counsellor tells you about choosing a college, but definitely search beyond their repertoire and find what best suits you. At one point I simply googled ‘best psychology degree programs’ or ‘psychology degree programs’ and applied to every college I found. Even if they seem out of your league or somewhere you don’t think you’d like or fit into, apply anyway! I can’t stress that enough. The more colleges you apply to, the better. If you apply to as many schools as you can, sure you might be rejected by your top school, but there will be plenty of other schools out there just begging you to choose them.

Choosing a major is another stressful and overwhelming task. At the beginning of my senior year in high school, I remember feeling so certain about what I wanted to do. I wanted to go into psychology, minor in Spanish, and be a therapist when I got out of college. Around the middle of the year, I realized that even though I love counselling people and helping with their emotional problems, I get too emotionally attached to my “clients” and probably wouldn’t be a good professional therapist. Then I decided to apply to some schools while labelling myself as an anthropology or sociology major (now that I’m taking a sociology class, I’m very glad I didn’t pick any of the schools who wanted me for that!). When that wore off, I thought about telling prospective schools that I was going into their program undeclared, but I was afraid that I wouldn’t get accepted if I didn’t have a clear idea of what I wanted. The truth is, it’s okay not to know what you want at this age. We’re 18, we barely know how to do taxes, let alone figure out what we want to do with the rest of our lives! Toward the end of the year, when the deadlines to pick a school were drawing closer with every breath I took, I got back in touch with my psychologist side and leaned more heavily toward the schools I had gotten accepted to for psychology.

I had a shortlist of three schools, Eckerd College, Emmanuel College, and Austin College. Then I dragged it down to Eckerd College or Austin College. Finally, I chose Eckerd College to be my school and I emailed all the other schools who wanted me that I would not be attending their schools for reasons I pulled out of nowhere, just to be polite. NEVER EMAIL SCHOOLS YOU’RE NOT GOING TO unless you’ve checked under every rock and dug into every hole you could find. There was a gigantic problem with my college of choice:

MONEY.

When you’re looking for colleges, money doesn’t seem like a big problem. College as a concept doesn’t even seem real, let alone the prospect of student loan debt or financial aid. Even if your parents say that money doesn’t matter or tell you to pick a school you love and they’ll find a way to handle the costs, DON’T BELIEVE THEM. They’re trying to be supportive when in reality, they know as much about what they’re doing and will have to do as you do: absolutely nothing. Even if you think you’re the expert at all things college, you’re not. Always get advice from other people, especially adults who have gone through it before. Before you accept the offer of the ivy-league school that’ll cost $60-70,000 per year, think about that but multiplied by 4. That’s $240-280,000 by the time you’re out of college. You’ll be paying that student loan until your children put you in a home; don’t do that to yourself and don’t do that to your parents because they’ll have to pay it while you’re enrolled because believe it or not, being a full-time student isn’t the most forgiving schedule, and it’ll be tough to find a job that you can keep up with along with your studies. Believe me, you’ll think you can handle everything, you’ll think you’re invincible once college starts, but a few weeks into it and you’ll be shaking with the pressure of it all.

I ended up going to University of Massachusetts (or UMass) Lowell, a school that was only on my list because it was close and if I’m completely honest, it was one of my safety schools (a school I knew I was going to get into, and only applied in case I didn’t get into my top schools- which I did). I ended up here because it was the most financially sound, and I wasn’t happy about it. As someone who’s grown up in and around the city of Lowell, to go to a college that’s basically in your backyard wasn’t my cup of tea. But it was the smart choice, so I sucked it up and accepted. It turned out to be a great choice. The people here are nice, the professors are great and friendly if you take a minute to get to know them. There are always events happening (even though I don’t go to them) and there’s always something to do (even if that something is sitting on a hill with your friend on South Campus, blowing grass whistles and watching the marching band practice 😛 ).

Regardless of which college you choose, whether or not you think it’s a good fit, try it. College is a good time. Even being someone who doesn’t party at all, I have a few friends and we have a good time together. If you’re that person who’s not good at making friends, talk to your professors, be friendly with them. A good topic starter is always a question about a certain professor’s area of expertise –most professors have one– a research area they’ve studied for their entire career. If you’re comfortable with your professors, not only will that open up academic opportunities for you, but you’ll be more comfortable in your classes and you’ll start talking to your classmates. I know you don’t think you will, but you’d be surprised how easily it happens. Take me for example, I go to class, do my homework, walk around campus with a book and my headphones in, and I’ve still managed to make some friends, and it’s only been a month.

When in doubt: give someone a pencil or a pen if you see that they need one. That’s the easiest way to open conversation and make a new (possibly best-) friend.