This article was originally written for FirstGenerationStudent.com, now a part of ImFirst.org.
By definition, first-generation students (FGS) are the children of parents who, themselves, did not go to college. Of course, we all know that this is not a stigma for you or your parents—that’s just the way your lives have unfolded. However, you do face certain challenges due to your parents’ lack of college experience that other students most likely do not face. Research points to the following four challenges.
The Challenges You’ll Face
1) Your parents may not understand your motivation for going to college.
Depending, at least in part, upon how certain you are in your choice of career prior to entering college, your parents may not fully appreciate or understand the value of the college degree you are seeking. At worst, they may feel defensive about their own career choices and be wary about your career aspirations.
2) Your parents may be reluctant to obtain financial aid.
Whether they are first-generation or not, most students must obtain some type of financial aid to help them afford college. Your parents may not be familiar with the concept of financial aid for college. They may have taken out loans to pay for things, such as a house or a car, but they may not be as familiar with the idea of taking out a loan for a service.
3) Your parents may not be able to help you navigate potentially confusing processes.
These confusing processes include applying for and accepting admission into college, obtaining financial aid, arranging for room and board, signing up for classes, applying for internships and obtaining a job upon graduation. Your parents may have the best of intentions; however, having never done it themselves, they are more likely than parents who did attend college to either overlook some of these vital processes or provide only a helpless shrug when you ask them what you should do.
4) Your parents may not be able to provide you with the advice and emotional support you may require during more stressful times in school.
Don’t get me wrong—your parents love you and will “feel your pain.” However, due to their lack of familiarity with what you are going through in college, they may not know the right things to say or do that can really help you through your situation.
How to Deal with the Challenges
Although the challenges above may seem daunting, they are not insurmountable! They are overcome every day by people just like you. Here are a few positive steps you can take to minimize the negative impact of having parents who did not go to college:
1) Communicate
Effectively communicating with your parents is probably the most important thing you can do minimize the negative impacts associated with being a FGS. Do not assume that your parents know as much about college-related issues as other parents. Have regular talks about the whats, whys, hows and whens associated with your college activities. Send them information to read when you come across it. Finally, don’t forget to thank them (often!) for their support of your dreams.
2) Include Your Parents
When possible, include your parents in important meetings with school counselors and administrators. Let them experience some of what you are experiencing. They may not understand it as thoroughly as you, but they will gain a better understanding of what you are doing in college. More importantly, they will feel as if both you and they are going to college together. Take advantage of your college’s “Parent’s Day” to host your parents on campus so they can see where you live, where you study and what your classrooms look like.
3) Take Advantage of School Programs and Departments
Many colleges have established learning communities and mentoring programs specifically designed to assist FGS, so take the time to determine whether your school offers any special programs for students like you. If your school offers such programs, become familiar with them and let them know who you are. Then, if you do need some assistance and your parents are unable to provide the support you need, you will be aware of and comfortable with contacting alternative sources of support and advice. It’s not being weak—it’s being smart.
4) Develop a Circle of Good Friends
We all are social animals and we all need others to cope and succeed. Perhaps the best thing you can do to overcome the challenges of being an FGS is to reach out to other students to provide you with advice and support. Don’t just seek other FGS! Move outside of your comfort zone and develop positive relationships with students who are not like you—maybe those who are a year or two older or who are pursuing a different degree than you are. Having good friends whom you can talk to for advice and support is probably the best way to overcome the challenges presented by having parents who are not familiar with college life.
Half of the battle in overcoming challenges is being aware of their nature. The other half is taking constructive action to minimize their negative effects. Hopefully, your awareness level has been raised and some of these ideas will point you in the right direction for a successful college experience!